AI:6 - Upside Down
The Top 12 do Diana Ross…
- *Simon baited Seacrest to come out of the closet after Seacrest asked Simon for tips on wearing 4″ heels.
- *The guys generally sucked.
- *The top 4 girls distanced themselves from the pack.
- *Sanjaya looked, sounded, & moved like a girl.
All in all, it was what we’ve come to expect from AI:6.
I’m not a huge Diana Ross fan. There are certainly songs of hers that I like, but overall, she’s not my favorite, and I’m certainly not a fan of the whole “female performer of the 20th-century” hype. But, I guess she seemed normal enough for someone who’s been hearing that she’s “IT” for the past 40+ years. And it was interesting to see just what the King of Pop was going for with all of his plastic surgeries… 
For me, the most interesting development was that the performances were so weak across the board that the judges couldn’t help but struggle for ways to not be mean (even/especially Paula!). That was kinda fun to see.
Anyway, enough of the preliminaries. Here’s a rundown, in order of performance:
Brandon - “You Can’t Hurry Love”: I so wanted him to do well, but with the Phil Collins version of this song first & foremost in my head (thus proving that a guy can really nail this song), Brandon suffered through a sub-par performance. He might be safe, but only because one of the girls was even worse, and because one of the other guys has an unfortunate appeal.
Melinda - “Home”: Very, very good. But not the best of the evening. I was a little disappointed, but only a very little. You could tell that she was uncomfortable in her dress & heels. I’m fully on board, however, with Simon’s statement noting the similarity between Melinda & Gladys Knight (something I mentioned a few weeks back…). Melinda didn’t indelibly stamp her brand on the competition, but neither did she make us wonder if we had been wrong in our initial assessments. Ultimately, though, I think Melinda is clearly proving that (unlike the other background singer) she is clearly ready for the headliner spot.
Chris S. - “Endless Love”: I like what he attempted to do with the song. I like that he got kicked out of Bob Jones University. I just like him. I don’t, however, think that he succeeded with the risk that he took this week. It isn’t going to hurt him though, at least not this week. He’ll need to rebound in a big way next week if he wants to prove that he’s one of the two guys who can even hope to challenge the top 4 girls.
Gina - “Love Child”: Mayhaps if she didn’t have that silly tongue stud she’d be easier to understand. I thought it humorous that Diana Ross was using a made-up word (”pronunciate”) to sound all wise, when it was really just a mashup of “pronounce” & “enunciate” — he point was correct, but she was ironically using poor grammar to make it. Anyway, Gina did ok. Nothing special, but a solid, middle-of-the-pack performance that will easily get her onto the 10-person AI Tour this Summer.
Sanjaya - “Ain’t No Mountain High Enough”: Damn. If he’s not doing this on purpose, then he might want to think about taking Simon’s advice for Seacrest. Seriously, though, that was a horrid performance. By far the worst of the night for the guys. Unfortunately, I think he’ll be saved by the combo of his unfortunate fanbase, Brandon’s weak performance, and the really bad performance of the girl who followed him…
Haley - “Missing You”: Wow. That was, well, horrendous. The only upside was that she looked good (except for the fact that the hemline bow on her dress made her butt look poufy (poofy + puffy = poufy)). Watching that performance had to have been excruciating for Sabrina. While Sanjaya’s ineptitude made me annoyed/angry, Haley’s just made me sad. The best thing to come from it was Simon’s unexpected show of humanity in not piling on. Seriously, he handled his critique magnificently, because if he had been like he often/normally is, I think he might have broken her spirit. I really don’t remember anyone else ever buckling so severely under the pressure of the big stage.
Phil - “I’m Gonna Make You Love Me”: A solid effort that I didn’t think was as bad as the judges seemed to think. It wasn’t great, but it wasn’t bad either. Probably on par with Gina’s, meaning that it was safely in the middle of the pack.
LaKisha - “God Bless The Child”: The performance of the night. LaKisha grabbed the competition & shook it around a bit, much like Ruben did back in AI:2’s round of 12 week. If LaKisha & Melinda can keep it up, it’s going to be great fun seeing them trade punches & raise the ante over the next 11 weeks. There’s a lot of Kelly Clarkson-ish genuineness & humility in LaKisha, and that will serve her well in building a fanbase.
Blake - “You Keep Me Hangin’ On”: I liked what he did with the arrangement of the song. It wasn’t as good as Kim Wilde’s 80’s remake mind you, but it was good enough that (given the proper studio polish) it could be successful on the radio today. It is obviously clear that Blake is a well-rounded contemporary artist. I hope that this won’t hurt him, though, as it seems like he doesn’t completely trust his singing voice. Like Randy & Paula said, Blake is a very good singer, and he doesn’t need to do the other things he’s good at to “compensate” for his seeming lack of vocal confidence. I think he’s going to be the only guy who seriously has a chance to crack the top 3 or 4.
Stephanie - “Love Hangover”: She’s good. Very, very good. If she can keep it up & be consistent, she might have a shot at the top 3. Even if she doesn’t, though, I think that a smart producer will snap her up & get her record made. She very much reminds me of LaToya London from AI:3, and I’m very interested in seeing how she develops & progresses over the coming weeks.
Chris R. - “The Boss”: Eh. He seems like a nice enough kid, but I’m just not a fan of his voice (it’s a bit too high-pitched for me…). I didn’t like his performance all that much — it wasn’t bad, but neither was it good. It just was. Ultimately, I think he will share a fanbase with Phil, and that Phil will do a better job of consolidating that base, thus edging Chris out of the competition in the next few weeks.
Jordin - “If We Hold On Together”: Here we have the wildcard/darkhorse contestant. Jordin is, I think, a combination of Kimbery Locke (AI:2 3rd place) & Diana Degarmo (AI:3 runner up), where her total package far outshines the sum of those two parts. If anyone can break into the Melinda/LaKisha dyad, it’s Jordin. She has a youthfulness and a beauty that neither Melinda nor LaKisha have. And while her voice is currently not quite as good, it is still unformed enough that her upside/potential is tantalizing. Jordin could very well be the breakout star of AI:6, who will be best served by not winning the competition (ala Clay, Bo, & Daughtry).
Overall, I was a little disappointed by the evening’s performances, even as there were a few rays of hope shining throughout. Hopefully, coming weeks will see those rays start to dominate the cloud cover of average performances.
The Predictions:
Safe: Chris S., Melinda, LaKisha, Blake, Chris R. Stephanie, Jordin, Phil, & Gina
The Bottom 3: Sanjaya, Brandon, Haley
The Voting @ Schloß TB:
Mel: Sanjaya
Deb: Blake
ghp: LaKisha
(note: Mel is the 9.5 y/o Territorial Daughter, and Deb is the Territorial Wife…)
Going Home: Should be Sanjaya, but will probably be Brandon (due to a slew of sympathy votes for Haley)
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