Territorial Bloggings

Tonight, the guys take a whack at the music of the 70’s.

Ricky Minor & the band - hot. The three judges - blah, blah, same ol’ blah. Let’s learn more about the contestants, ok? Oh, can we?

Let’s get started, shall we?

Michael Johns - Go Your Own Way - He’s a competent singer, but this song choice & performance did him no favors. There was something more than a little affected about the performance. Not a great way to start the show, by a longshot, because it was boooring. “Coasting”? good word for it, Simon. Paula needs to stop thinking & judging with her ovaries.

Jason Castro - I Just Want To Be Your Everything - Dude is pretty. Very pretty. Even though the Territorial Spouse just hates the dreads, she likes him in spite of them. This kid is charismatic & has that “X Factor” presence about him. Keep an eye on him, he’s safe until well into the finals. Randy was full of crap in his assessment. Didn’t suit his voice, Simon? Nope, I don’t think that’s true. Schmaltzy? Sure, but that’s not a bad thing, as long as it doesn’t become a habit.

Luke Menard - Killer Queen - I think he’s going to be done in by his a cappella background & experience. His vocals are a little too stylized and he hasn’t fully made the transition to singing with music. I’m having a hard time putting it exactly in the right words, but there was just something, you know, off about it. The perfect song? Nope. There was almost like a Barbershop Quartet, gay 1890’s, quality about it. Simon was kinda right with the “whiny” comment. I didn’t like it, and I’m not sure America will.

Robbie Carrico - Hot Blooded - Even before he sings, he gets lippy about Simon not getting his “levels” of Rock authenticity. Please. He just pegged my poseur-o-meter. Well, now we know what a boy-band rendition of Foreigner sounds like. Lou Gramm would be rolling in his grave, if he were dead, that is. Poseur. Poseur. Poseur. When Paula is your champion, you are in dire straits. Dire, indeed.

Danny Noriega - Superstar - It looks like he was in an all-girls punk rock band. You know, I probably can’t write anything that won’t get me in trouble, as he’s a walking, talking, singing stereotype. Ruben Studdard (who retired Superstar for AI) would be, if he were dead, rolling over in his grave. Magical? The Carpenter’s take? Karen Carpenter sounds more manly. Ish? Get this punk-ass, girly-boy off of my TV.

David Hernandez - Papa Was A Rolling Stone - Tried to get his funk on. Ricky & the band certainly did. David? Not so much. His voice was a hair too high to pull it off - there needs to be more of a lower, growl to make it truly work for me. He did ok by comparison to the mediocrity that preceded him. I hate having to damn someone with faint praise, but that’s what has to be done in this case.

Jason Yeager - Long Train Running - Who? He’s got too thin of a voice for my taste. It was a pleasant enough song, but it certainly wasn’t good, much less good enough to warrant another week. He abused the cheez-o-meter with that performance. Paula couldn’t say anything good. That says a lot. None of it good. He is most certainly not heart & soul, not any more than Pat Boone was R&B back in the 50’s.

Chikezie - I Believe - Eze got his preppie on, with the double polos. Too bad he didn’t have the collars popped - if it’d been an 80’s theme week, I’d have expected that. It’s time to damn someone else with faint praise. Chikezie actually sounded much better this week, and in the face of the rest of the guys taking a collective dump on stage, I think Chikezie earned himself another week. He was sassy to Simon again, but it was a little more playful, so I’ll let it slide.

David Cook - All Right Now - A word geek. I like it. Nice guitar work & the band had a nice crunch to it. It wasn’t a terribly taxing song, vocally, but he did it very well. He proved that you show you’re authentic Rock out on the stage, not by talking about “levels” like the poseurs do. He is Bo to Carrico’s Constantine. Boring? I think not. No charisma? I think not. If you’re going to talk back to Simon, do it the way David did. David was right, and that’s why Simon acted so pissy when he got called on his boolsht.

David Archuleta - Imagine - The song’s anti-religious claptrap aside, David did this song better than any other AI contestant ever has. That includes Ruben’s rendition in the AI:2 finale. This was the first AI “moment” of the season, almost, but not quite, up there with Clay’s Solitaire and Bo’s In A Dream. This kid is the front-runner among the guys at this point.

Talk about sucking in the Seventies… the guys certainly took it literally, didn’t they?

Well, thank goodness for the Davids this week. Archuleta & Cook saved the show, and Hernandez was better than everyone else other than Castro.

This has got to make the girls feel a whole lot better about their chances, after the lackluster job they did last week. Hopefully they’ll pick up & run with the ball that the guys fumbled. We’ll see tomorrow.

At risk: Yeager, Menard, Carrico, Noriega, & Johns

Will and Should Go Home: Yeager & Menard

-ghp