AI:7 - Pre-Results shtuff
Lots o’ stuff rattling around in the blogosphere, in the aftermath of the final performance show last night.
By and large, most of it is hewing to what the judges were bleating, in that folks have already coronated Archuleta.
Reality News Online has its usual strong summary of/commentary on the performances, though I must say they are a bit too resigned to the inevitability of Gnome-boy’s victory than I am.
As always, Reality Blurred has a great summary on what’s going on & being said. Of particular interest is the report from MSNBC, wherein an anonymous source states that Idol producers want Cook to win because Archuleta & his “camp” are considered to be “unmanageable”, his father to be “another Joe Simpson”, and “producers don’t want a rogue winner”. Fascinating. Mayhaps they should’ve communicated that to their judges before they embarrassed themselves by all but formally declaring him the winner last night. Well, Randy even did that, didn’t he?
One last nugget to put in the information hopper: DialIdol.com shows Cook significantly ahead of Archuleta. They’ve been wrong often enough this season, but I don’t think that this is quite the blow-out that so many have made it out to be (I’m talking to you, Dawg!).
I’m fully expecting to be greeted by Seacrest this evening, and to be told that, “we’ve had OUR. CLOSEST. VOTE. EVER. AMERICA. And your winner is… David. You’ll find out which one, America, after the break. And the next two hours…”
-ghp
AI:7 - Welcome to the Boomtown
Well. Here we are. It’s all come down to this. What started back in January, ends here in May.
We made it. Yay for us. 
David & David. And I even get to make a throw-away pop-culture reference to an obscure mid-80’s, sorta one-hit wonder (hint: Google the title of this post/entry. Bonus points if you got the reference without having to Google it. Even more Bonus points if you know what handsome Kevin got got or what miss Christina drives…)
I’m glad this season is just about over. I’m glad that I’m reasonably confident that David Cook will beat Gnome-boy. I’m really glad that So You Think You Can Dance 4 starts on Thursday! This season of AI has embodied all that is good & bad about the franchise. It’s been up & down. It’s been excessive, loud, overbearing, self-important, faux, cloying, & absurd. It’s also been inspiring, touching, chock-full-o-talent, fun, and just plain good. It’s been a pleasure to watch, and it’s been a guilty pleasure. Sometimes both at the same time.
Michael Buffer? Boxing-style tale-of-the-tape? Meh…
Cook will win. Archuleta is an immature 17. Last year, Jordin was a mature 17, and it showed, as she grew before our eyes over the course of the competition. This year, Gnome-boy has regressed each week, especially when compared against the stark professionalism & maturity of David Cook. Gnome-boy has become more & more child-like each & every week. He hasn’t crumbled, per se, but neither has he grown and excelled. And that’s a damning observation, when push comes to shove.
David Cook, on the other hand, has grown, stretched, and matured as an artist. He has developed a killer instinct as a contestant on the AI stage, understanding how to work within the parameters of the weekly grind, in terms of manipulating arrangements, genre, & song choices. He’s mastered this as much as anyone ever has on the AI stage. Anyone.
Note: that coin flip? Gnome-boy won it, but had to look out to Daddy-Dearest in order to make his choice…
Round 1 - Clive Davis’ Choice
Cook: I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For - A nice enough interpretation, but not a knock-out performance. The performance by the band didn’t do justice to the vocal performance, IMO, and that brought it down a notch or so. That said, his fanbase is solid, and it’s a fanbase that is (I think) virulently anti-Gnome-boy, so he won’t be hurt.
Here’s the thing, though - I don’t think that tonight’s performances matter, in terms of the final vote & results. I think the voting blocs are pretty much set. There might be some play amongst undecideds, but only if someone really screws up & drives votes to the other guy. That is, I think votes could be lost tonight, but not won…
Archuleta: Don’t Let The Sun Go Down On Me - A typical performance by Gnome-boy. It was well within his narrow range of expertise. As long as he isn’t challenged to go outside that zone, he’ll be OK and he’ll make his fans swoon (and the judges risk statutory indictment). Given what usually happens on finale performance shows, then, I think he’ll be safe.
Round 2 - Songwriter’s Choice
Cook: Dream Big - The up-tempo choice was a very good one, as was bringing out the guitar. He is well served when he plays up his rock-star/front-man chops. The song itself wasn’t near as good as the first one, but the performance was way better. He’s proving his versatility. He’s proving his artistry. He’s proving his bones & why he deserves to win the whole enchilada.
Archuleta: In This Moment - Ballad. Blah, blah, blah. Message. Meh, meh, meh. The same old Gnome-boy. The same old wooden moves & hand gestures. The same old, oh-so-meaningful facial expressions & squinty-closed eyes. Gosh! I’m so over the saccharine triteness from Utah. When Randy says “You can sing the phonebook, you’re so hawt, dawg!” you know it wasn’t that good.
Round 3 - Contestant’s Choice
Cook: The World I Know - Acoustic start = nice. Emotive connection with the song = outstanding. Emotion after finishing the song = outstanding. He’s very possibly the perfect AI contestant. A rocker. Sensitive. A theater guy. A bit Emo. Funny. Mature. Humble. Sincere. Respectful. Consistent. Creative. A risk-taker. Seriously, what’s not to like? What’s not to vote for?
Re: repeating a song, David was right, Simon was WRONG.
Archuleta: Imagine - COP. OUT. He is a coward. An unimaginative coward. This proves to me he’s an immature, and probably insecure, artist, because at this most important stage of the competition, he regressed & retreated to a safe place rather than boldly make a new conquest. For this alone, he deserves to lose the competition. Begone Gnome-boy, you epic annoyance - darken my TV screen no longer. (Well, ok, one more night, but after tomorrow, no more!)
Now that all is said and done, after 5 long months, I’ll leave you with this:
1) The judges are full of it. Plain and simple. They want Gnome-boy to win. A knock-out? Nope. He was the best? Nope. I don’t see it and I don’t get it. Archuleta will not, I repeat NOT, be a moneymaker for them - he’s destined to be a dud, as he doesn’t even have Broadway potential.
2) Cook for the win — Make it so, America.
-ghp
AI:7 - Top 3 x 3
Once again, the circumstances of day-to-day life (read: redhead #1’s first softball game of the season) precluded my preferred live-blogging approach of writing up my thoughts on the performance show. Now that were at the penultimate performance show, however, and I (along with most folks & the AI show itself) am running out of steam & enthusiasm for this edition of AI, I’ll take this break in the routine as a positive opportunity, rather than a negative.
In other words, I’m gonna change up my format & try to keep things reasonably readable.
Round 1 - Judges’ Song Choice - Winner: David Cook
This round was sadly predictable in that Randy & Paula did (respectively) Syesha & David A. no favors in their song choices. I guess Paula sort of gave David a chance to stretch himself, but he failed miserably. Randy pandered to his own ego, and let Syesha fall back into the trap of imitating a current star - something that caused her all sorts of trouble back when she was on the brink of elimination many weeks ago prior to her recent resurgence.
Simon was the only one who got it right, with his choice of song for David Cook. Yes, it was a tiny bit old fashioned. But, more important, it gave David a chance to show (yet again!) that he is a talented and versatile artist, one who is capable of stretching & growing, and of bending & molding the music, such that both he and the music both end up in new & exciting places.
Perhaps the most frightening part of the first round was that Paula spoke truth, when she correctly observed that it wasn’t about Randy & Simon dumping testosterone on each other, but rather about the singers & what they did with the songs. Scary…
Round 2 - Singers’ Song Choice - Winner: David Cook
This was the weakest of the three rounds, and the one where I think the 90 second time limitation was the most obviously evident.
Syesha, well, I’m not quite sure what she was thinking, but I don’t think her choice was as damaging as the judges did. Frankly, I was expecting Simon & Randy’s reactions - it was Paula’s that surprised me. That’s about as close to a verbal bitch-slap as we’ll ever see from Ms. Abdul - I think it’s pretty clear that she didn’t like that song choice. At all.
David Archuleta’s song choice was, quite honestly, illuminating & baffling. Baffling, because I don’t know why he would decide to go outside his wheelhouse now, of all times. Illuminating because it proves my earlier point about David Cook, re: versatility. This type of versatility is something that David Archuleta has proven himself singularly incapable of doing! It is why he should not win the competition. Yes, he is talented. No, he is not versatile. Yes, he has skills. No, he is not a complete artist.
David A.’s failure in stepping out of his talent zone was so obvious that even Paula & Randy couldn’t lob the usual praise bombs his way after his 90 second crapfest. They didn’t eviscerate it like they did Syesha’s (superior) performance, but neither did they risk a visit from the Special Victims Unit, like they do after the “normal” Gnome-boy warbling session.
David Cook’s second song was merely OK. He got hosed by the 90 second time limitation. I’ll say he won the round only because the other two did worse - it’s a backhanded compliment, but a compliment nonetheless.
Round 3 - Producers’ Song Choice - Winner: David Cook
Honestly, the producers screwed over Syesha. Big time. A song from the Happy Feet soundtrack? Really? Who’d she piss off? Wow…
And, despite Simon’s protestations about the cheeziness of Longer (of course it’s cheezy - that’s what makes it great!), I thought it was actually a great choice for Gnome-boy. It actually solidified in my mind what his niche is. He’s a balladeer in the Dan Fogelberg/Christopher Cross mold. He’s just not quite that good yet. Some day he might be, and he will probably make a nice bit of money from it, as long as his dad doesn’t suck the will to perform and/or live out of him before then.
Closing the show in the pimp slot was David Cook, and he did it up right, proving that he is the one David who belongs to be in the finals next week NO. MATTER. WHAT.
Should Go Home: David “The Gnome-Boy” Archuleta
Will Go Home: Syesha
I don’t think it’s a foregone conclusion that it will be an all-David finale, or that Archuleta is a/the lock to be there. I think it’s quite possible that Syesha could sneak into the finale, and that she could do it at Gnome-boy’s expense. It’s a gut feeling I have, based on equal parts of my personal preference & my take on how the voting blocs could break down - i.e., Syesha has a unique & potentially significant voting bloc, while the Davids split some demographic groups in such a way that I see the majority going to Cook because he’s more completely/versatilely talented (and the folks who like/respect that will get out the vote to protect that against the tween vote for Gnome-boy).
Or, I could be full of crap. We’ll see…
-ghp
AI:7 - The Top 4 Rock (well, at least 3 do)
Circumstances dictated that I not write up my thoughts as I watched the performances this week. It’s probably just as well, as I was tired & cranky. As I’ve had a chance to consider my initial thoughts & then tweak them a little bit, I’m actually surprised at just how much thought & consideration I’m able to put into it when I’m writing them up during a ‘normal’ week of doing it while watching the performances. I very much prefer doing it that way now. Yesterday was just a perfect storm of getting kids to practices & then getting myself to meetings at church. (I know, I know - priorities… )
David C. - Hungry Like the Wolf & Baba O’Riley - David is not a Duran Duroid, plus, the AI production staff did him no favors with how they mixed the audio on the first song - the band was nowhere to be found, and the song suffered because of it. The second song was much, much better, both as a song, and as a performance. Given Jason’s self-immolation, I don’t think this unfortunate dip in song choice (combined with the accursed first slot in the final four upset week) will hurt him. Thankfully…
Syesha - Proud Mary & A Change Is Gonna Come - She’s peaking at a good time - sounding good, looking fabu, & benefiting from being the only girl left. She ain’t that great, but she is the best girl left singing. And that’s enough to get her into this season’s Top 3. Although Syesha might’ve, just might’ve mind you, been better served by not equating her getting into the AI top 4 with the Civil Rights movement of the 1960’s. I’m just sayin’…
Jason - I Shot the Sheriff & Mr. Tambourine Man - Good Lord. He just gave up, didn’t he? Never before has a contestant just flat out given up on such a big stage. I’m even more offended than Randy & Simon, especially after seeing Carly in the audience. Jason doesn’t want to be in the competition any more, & I don’t want to write about him any more.
David A. - Stand By Me & Love Me Tender - Gag. If the judges stroked him any more, it would be considered statutory child abuse. He’s not that good, folks. A glimpse into his soulless, unfeeling eyes will tell you that. If Jason wasn’t so painfully bad, I’d really push harder to see Gnome-boy gone. He’s got as much soul as a hunk of government fromage.
Should Go Home: Jason
Will Go Home: Jason
I was not happy to see David C. in the oft-cursed lead-off slot this week, the week of the final-four, when so many true upsets have happened in odd-numbered past seasons (Tamyra in AI:1, LaToya in AI:3, & Daughtry in AI:5). I was hoping that this year we might see David A. somehow sneak in as the Final Four “upset special”. I don’t think that’ll happen. Neither, though, do I think we’ll see David C. get the Ziggy. No, I think that Jason will deservedly get sent home, unless his fans are as high as he seems to want to be, or are just plain stupid. He obviously wants to go home, and I think he deserves to go home. You don’t disrespect the contest at this stage (by forgetting lyrics, for example) without paying a price. I hope.
-ghp
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